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  • julia_sonderholm 8:05 pm on March 12, 2017 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , society, women   

    Captain Kirk, get out of that chair. 

    “I looked to my girl,” Jude Kelly says in her ted talk ‘Why women should tell the stories of humanity’, “and she was crying because she couldn’t save ET.”

    And then I started thinking back to my own childhood. Because even as a kid, I could not remember not saving ET. In my mind I still thought I was the one saving ET. Not the little boy. Not little Elliot or Henry Thomas. Not Steven Spielberg. But me. Me, as a girl. I was the kid on the bike with the alien in my basket. I ‘ET Phone’d Home’ all day after watching it.

    No matter what movie I watched as a kid. Star Trek, male captain, no problem, I just pictured myself in that seat. Yes I was a 10 year old captain. Youngest of her time. Star Wars. Luke who? You mean Julia the Jedi? The secret daughter of Anakin Skywalker? Matt Damon as Spirit? Please. I spent about five years of my childhood believing I was a stallion until somebody told me that a stallion was a male horse, at which point, I became just a horse. And after that I was Indiana Jones. Simba. Petra Pan. I’d plan out traps in case my parents left me home alone. Because in my eyes, they weren’t men, they were characters. Actors taking on the role. And if they could, I could too.

    For me, growing up amongst male heroes and male figures, I was OK with female representation being reserved to Disney princesses because my favourites were Mulan and Kida. I didn’t think much about Cinderella or Belle or the pink dresses or the fairies. I was Kiki the little witch, Dorothy lost on the yellow brick road. My female heroes were exactly that: heroes, and idols, and characters I could look up to.

    I never saw myself as underrepresented until I was in my later teens. After reading book after book written by men, watching movie after movie featuring main male characters, one after the other, great movies directed by men and written by men and amazing soundtracks, again, made by men, that I started questioning where were all the women?

    What this blogpost actually wanted to address was the fact that I, even as a little girl, saw my self in the men’s roles and positions. Not as the male characters, but as myself, a girl, and that there are girls out there right now who can’t see themselves in those positions or as those characters off saving the world.

    And I ask myself why? Why can’t they? Why can’t Jude Kelly’s little daughter Caroline see her self saving ET? Are they brought up with families enforcing gender roles in a different way? Lack of imagination?

    What makes some girls, no matter their age, let men get in the way of their imagination?

    But no matter the answer, Jude Kelly argues for one thing that is true: women should tell the stories too!

  • julia_sonderholm 9:24 am on February 22, 2017 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: education, ib, school, society, university   

    I’m just a thirty.one. 

    From a young age, we are told to be successful. Be a doctor. Be a lawyer. Sit at a desk. Do what you’re told. Be good.

    We’re told what’s right and what is wrong. How to speak, sit, eat properly. School tells us, that to succeed we must comply, so we comply. We sit, learn, listen –  even if we don’t understand.

    We’re told to take tests and pass them. They will determine our intelligence, our capabilities, and by extension, our worth. Only if we pass can we move on to something else; something more; something better.

    Tests, filled with questions to fool and tease, questions where an artist has to become a mathematician and a mathematician a historian.

    We realize only too late. Once we’ve already spent years trying to pass. That they don’t determine our worth: our life: how good we are.

    Our lives cannot be put down in scores.

    Our intelligence not measured by percentages.

    I didn’t do well in my tests. Even if my teachers said I would: they told me I could be whatever I wanted to be because I was good. I did well. I complied. I studied.

    I did what I was told.

    But, they hadn’t expected 31 (you could have gotten 36, 38, they say – if only you had tried harder. did more.). What could I do now since my life, my worth, has been put down into two numbers: 31.


    (Thirty-one was the price tag I had to sell myself with).

    I couldn’t be a doctor.

    A lawyer.

    I couldn’t go to ‘my’ university.

    I couldn’t tell my teachers I would succeed.

    I was lost.


    Numbers telling me that I should have studied more. Harder. 31 telling me that I wasn’t good enough.

    (My mom kissed my cheek, pulled me into a hug: and said, it’ll be okay, you’ll figure it out. She wiped away my tears with her thumb, looked at me and saw much more than a score. Much more than what a test thought I was. Much more than 31.)

    Why not do what I like? Enjoy? Why not be my own passion. My own guide.

    They still laugh at me when I say what I do. (Anthropology, oh you poor fool). Their eyes widen with sympathy and they shake their heads in pity as they tell me I can never be accomplished: never be what they wanted. Never as good as a 36. 38. 42.

    They, is society: a collaborate union of those who have passed. That even as I am studying: trying to become something. The snicker of those, who according to my teachers did better, scored higher, scored thirty eight, drowned out what I wanted.

    I shiver as I think I’ve made a mistake because I’ll never be accomplished, succeed, I’ll never be what society tells me it needs.

    But here I am. This is me.

    And I will succeed (according to my own standards) –


    but i am only 31 out of 45.

  • julia_sonderholm 2:19 pm on February 20, 2017 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: body-image, sexual bodies, society, stereotypes, woman   

    The (monstrous) female nipple 

    Would a woman wearing a white t-shirt bra-less be considered provocative?

    Versus her male counterpart who does so regularly? 

  • julia_sonderholm 2:07 pm on February 20, 2017 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: bi-lingual, , society   

    Bi-lingual scolding 

    Reminder to research why mothers tend to ‘scold’ their bi-lingual children in a different language than the main one spoken. My bi-lingual friends agree, this appears to be a common thing.

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